Yoga

We can add that to the (long) list of things I've tried, hated and will never do again! I work out 5-7 days a week and I am desperate to break up my routine with something fun and different. First I tried Zumba, which I had done once years ago and sworn it off back then. I gave it another try but failed miserably. I have no rhythm and I am uncoordinated as hell. It just didn't work out.

So they just started up a yoga class here as they finally got a certified instructor on the island. This requires no rhythm and no memorizing dance steps, I should be able to do this, right? I gave myself far too much credit! First of all there is just way too much breathing and sitting going on. I am not a relaxed kind of person, it is physically impossible for me to just sit, idle, ever. So sitting cross legged with my hands on my knees taking deep breaths was torture right out the gate. Then it got worse. I am limber and flexible and I can stretch, but I have ZERO balance. Like none! I was falling all over the place, it was comical. At one point as we went into tree poses the instructor brought over a chair for the big preggo girl to use to catch herself if she lost her balance. It took all my willpower not to jump up and down shouting "where's my chair?!" Seriously, this chick has a bowling ball in her belly and hadn't lost her balance once the entire class, and I've been flat on my ass at least twice so far and SHE gets the chair?!?!

I did like the stretching part, I can do that. But anything requiring balance or grace is out of the question. It's really a miracle I can walk upright on my own two feet and I don't even do that well! The worst part was the end of class where we had to lay on our backs on the mat for five minutes relaxing in silence and deep breathing. FIVE MINUTES? Is she CRAZY? Seriously I can't sit still for five seconds! I laid there staring at the ceiling trying to clear my mind and relax my body and it wasn't going to happen. After about 60 seconds I was twitching and shaking my leg because all the stillness was making me crazy. I glanced around and all the other girls looked so peaceful, relaxed and into it. Nope, not this girl! So I reached for my phone and started checking my email and playing Words while I waited for the five minutes of torture to end. I probably broke some cardinal rule of yoga, my chi is going to be all jacked up, karma is out to get me now and my universe is going to be off axis as punishment. I couldn't help it, I can't just LAY there and do nothing! I guess I'll just have to stick to running. Group exercise just isn't my thing apparently.